This week, “Bachelor” Sean Lowe took the final three women on overnight dates in Thailand. Blond Sean was like Goldilocks, choosing between the three women. One was too simple, one was too complicated, and another was just right.
Lindsay Yenter: Too Simple
Lindsay comes across as very young, not age-wise, but more that she comes across as very inexperienced. She doesn’t seem to have a lot of intellectual or emotional depth.
There doesn’t seem to be a lot of substance to her relationship with Sean either. Every time I see them together, I feel like he’s just going through the motions, falling back on standard franchise cliches such as “amazing,” “incredible woman,” and “she has all the qualities I am looking for in a wife” because he has nothing else to say.
Instead of “paint by numbers,” their relationship feels like “date by numbers.” All the individual elements are there. They have their romantic moments, their playful moments (feeding chimps and eating bugs). They talk about wanting to “settle down,” “have a family,” how they “share the same values” and “want the same things out of life.”
But it all seems so formulaic and scripted, like he could be doing and saying the same things with anyone who just happens to be a good paper match.
This week, Lindsay told Sean that she loved him. This was supposed to be a climactic moment in their date, but it seemed to fall flat. When he kissed her afterwards, we could see that there was no chemistry. He was giving her pecks instead of real kisses.
AshLee Frazier: Too Complicated
While Lindsay is “too simple,” AshLee is too complicated. I’m not surprised that Sean sent her home this week. She has way too much emotional baggage!
Difficult life experiences do not make you “broken.” What’s more important is how you respond and grow from these experiences. Being abandoned by her birth parents, or getting married at 17 does not make her “damaged goods.” However, the way she incessantly obsesses over her “abandonment issues,” “trust issues,” and “control issues” sabotages her chances of having a healthy relationship.
For me, the biggest red flag was when she said that “before Sean, I had a broken spirit.” It’s one thing to want a relationship. It’s another thing to need it in order to fix you or to complete you. There’s a difference between wanting a boyfriend or husband vs. wanting a savior.
You can’t stake your entire happiness on one person. You can’t look for something or someone outside yourself to heal your “broken spirit.” You have to find it within.
This is why people in relationships tend to get hit on more. They’re not giving off the needy or desperate vibe, so they come across as more attractive.
My advice to AshLee: find a way to be happy and whole, regardless of your relationship status. When that happens, the rest will just fall into place naturally.
Catherine Giudici: Just Right
While I’m not sure whether or not she and Sean would make it in the long term, I think she has the healthiest perspective about the situation.
Of the three women, she seems to have the most believable relationship with Sean. He says that she “gets me better than anyone else.” And she can actually “be herself” around him, instead of trying to force it. That right there is the sign of a healthy relationship.
Catherine also has the right balance between genuinely wanting to give it a shot, but also having a life outside her relationship. She wants the love, marriage, and family, but she also has her own career goals and ambitions.
I get the sense that although she really cares for Sean, she doesn’t let her relationship status define her. I get the feeling that she’ll be okay whether or not this particular relationship works out. AshLee, take note: This is the kind of quality that will make you more attractive to the right guy.
Next week, the eliminated women will reunite in the “Women Tell All” special. Is AshLee still livid over her elimination? Does Desiree blame her brother for her elimination? Has Tierra learned from her experience on the show? This will be interesting to see.
More From This Contributor:
‘Bachelor’ Recap: What We Learned From ‘Sean Tells All’ Interview
‘Bachelor’ Sean Lowe Ambivalent About Hometown Dates
‘Bachelor’ Recap: AshLee Channels Her Inner Mama Grizzly
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