I’m just catching up on this whole online dating world. I’m single and living in Los Angeles. Why not?
I found a dating site for free, www.okcupid.com, and I give it a thumbs up. I haven’t tried the dozen other free dating sites, but many I have spoken to recommend OKC. So, here I am.
I’ve had a few months of learning and perfecting the basic set up details that require some thought:
- Writing my profile
- What not to write in my profile
- Selecting the best pictures to upload
In the hour I activated my OKC account, wrote my profile and uploaded my photos I had dozens of profile visits and messages. I was excited, nervous and overwhelmed. Do I respond to every message and read all those profiles? In the first few days I did exactly that. I learned the hard way. Responding to every email to acknowledge or send a thank you for a compliment was only leaving them with a feeling of hope.
When the email chain started to get too long and I felt the pressure from a guy to respond immediately, I fell off the face of the earth. Suffice it to say — I have hundreds of unread messages.
I’ll get more into my online dating experiences in my Dating in Los Angeles series, but I wanted to provide a few dating tips for guys who want a response back or even get girls to initiate the conversation.
1. Take better pictures. This is a controversial one. We all know that your “face” is the first thing to get noticed. Keep it current. If you feel you take bad pictures, you’d be surprised to learn that if a female likes the profile pic, she is going to click further to learn more about you. It’s what in your profile is where you win her over. Keep the pictures clear. Do not post pictures with your ex-girlfriend or hanging out with other females and having a wild time. It amazes me when I see this. I’ll pass.
2. Do not provide a long list of what you want in a woman. The profile is about you. Funny is great and trust me it puts a smile on our faces if you write it well. But are you proud of your career? Do you think your dog is the best buddy ever? Are you a vegan and proud of it? Show off what you’re passionate about. It’s really not as boring as you think.
3. Be honest with your height. OMG! It seems like almost 95% of the men on OKC or 6′ or over. It’s not true.
4 If you’re looking for short or long term or casual dating, then indicate so. Many women are looking for Mr. Right. But there are many other women who want to date just a few times too. Happily single women like variety and will keep in contact if you’re looking for the same thing.
I’m having a blast with online dating and I’ve only been on a few dates. I selected each date wisely. There is only one dating encounter I regret. And he won’t stop bothering me. With that exception, my choices get better every time.
I intentionally indicated I was on OKC for casual dating. It has led to a lot of unwanted inquiries but I didn’t want to mislead anyone. If I like a guy and it’s mutual, then I would gladly move on to the next step.