Growing up, I may not have the best life or the perfect parents. So as any normal kid, I have learned to adjust and bear with what we had.
In my young adulthood I told myself I’ll be the coolest dad that I can be. I will raise my kids the best I can. I’ll give them the good things I didn’t have. And I will not let them experience the not so good things in life.
The Best Laid Plans Do Not Always Work Out
But between that time, as a young man and now, as a parent of a ten year old, I can say that not all good intentions end up with all things good. And guess what? Life happens and it finds a way to mess up all our plans!
Like most young men, I have planned how I can be a great dad. But after much thought, I realize that it’s not the good things that I didn’t get to experience as a kid that have made me the best that I could be.
It is the Mistakes My Parents Allowed Me To Make Which Helped Me Became Who I Am
I can enumerate the many things that I have done in raising my kid this far that I now know I shouldn’t have. But the one thing that I know I should break, and time and time again I find myself not able to do is to let my child learn life on his own and allowing him enough breathing space to make mistakes.
By this I am not talking about being a careless, uninvolved and an indifferent dad. But rather I am talking about not being the exact opposite. I am talking about not being a perfectionist and an overly controlling parent who believes that his way is the only way.
It is hard. As a dad, I do not wish for my son to make the same mistakes I made. But then again I don’t really want my kid to grow up in a bubble and be too sheltered for his own good.
As a parent who loves my kid so much, I am slowly learning that sometimes, I have to allow him to fall down on his own, make mistakes and learn from them.
I know, I feel like I am the kid and it is my child teaching me, all over again. But loving my son entails allowing him that privilege and freedom to fall down, stand up, dust himself up and be totally prepared for this world which has become a much harder place to live in.
Learning from his own silly mistakes is much more important today, more than ever.
I know I love my son too much, not to let him experience these growing pains and figure a few things on his own, yes along with the bumps and bruises that goes with it.