Crystal was a good friend from church. On the surface, she appeared okay – a godly single mother who paid her tithes, prayed regularly with her children and always showed up for service. But one thing was tearing her apart – a failed marriage that left her bitter. After dropping her kids off with the ex, she’d always fall into a deep funk.
I was no better.
A father who had emotionally abandoned me held the strings to my heart. When I thought of him, I couldn’t sleep. I was angry, enraged by his betrayal. The bags under my eyes were always explained away as ‘too much late night TV’.
We both were caught up in two of the biggest mistakes Christians make that causes them to miss out on the joy of living life.
Pretense
Pretending everything is all right in order to appear holy or faith-filled. Suffering in secret and not getting the help necessary to resolve an ongoing issue that’s either affecting you mentally or physically.
Bitterness
Deep-seated anger or resentment about a life event. Questioning why God allowed it to happen and feeling as though you’ll never be ‘right’. The biggies: divorce, molestation, and abandonment.
Self Deprecation
Forgiving everyone else for being human, but yourself. Meditating on your weaknesses. Forgetting that God loves you as-is and empowers you to overcome or manage any frailties.
Being Too Loyal
Refusing to set boundaries in relationships. Falsely believing agape love doesn’t involve them. Consequences: continuing to attend a dead church in order to please family; staying married to an unfaithful person who refuses to change; and, remaining friends with an individual who treats you like a doormat.
Ignoring Finances
Failing to get a handle on your bills. Instead of taking a class on finances to improve your ability to budget or at least scaling back, you pray harder hoping that God will perform a miracle. After all, you do pay tithes and give offerings regularly.
Unforgiveness
Harboring hatred in your heart towards another. Whenever this person is around, you treat him or her poorly. Worse, you smile in this individual’s face while plotting revenge.
The above are six of the biggest mistakes Christians make. I’ve seen good men and women caught up in them wreck their own lives. If you can relate, do what I did, work on yourself with the help of others until you get better.
Also see:
Praise God
Weird Stuff I’d Like to Ask the Man Upstairs