There comes a time in a gal’s life when she loses her marbles, forgets what the heck is going on around her, and, at the end of the day, looks like a total dork.
I have made it to that point in my life.
I had a UTI trying to knock on my door. I was trying my hardest not to let it in. I took AZO and headed off to volunteer. I ended up being there for five and a half hours. I was dying by the end of it. After leaving, I raced to the nearest drugstore to buy more of the magic UTI pills.
There I was, at the drugstore, loading up on AZO and five, small bottles of cranberry juice. I decided to pay at the pharmacy after I glanced over and saw the gigantic line at the front of the store. I am standing in line at the pharmacy. Cranberry juice and AZO being juggled from arm to arm because who needs baskets to help carry things. It was finally my turn. I load the counter with all my goodies. People are standing on each side of me, glancing at the counter. Yes, I saw people looking at my blatant UTI remedying supplies.
“Oh, someone isn’t feeling very well today are they?” the pharmacist asked, but it was more of an announcement.
“No, I am not feeling the best.” I replied. I made eye contact with one of the gawkers. I just have a UTI, not the plague.
“Engaging in a lot of intercourse or the use of fragrant soaps are the leading causes of your predicament,” said the pharmacist.
I gave the pharmacist the look.
Realizing that pretty much the entire store was now listening in on what the pharmacist would say next and the fact that I can’t just let something go, I replied, “I will be sure to hold off on my marathon sex session for the day.”
I got the look right back.
“Will this be all for you today?” the pharmacist asked. Not being quick on the draw for a response, I said yes.
“Would you like a bag for allllll of this?” the pharmacist asked.
I gave the look right back to her and left with my bag of UTI supplies in tow.
I got to my car, downed one of the bottles of cranberry juice with a side of AZO (because I am classy like that) and drove off.
My diet of AZO and cranberry juice has helped tremendously. We shall see if the marathon sex session can once again resume. Who am I kidding? If I was given the opportunity to have a marathon sex session, a UTI would not get in the way. Take that, nasty pharmacist!