Remember those first few weeks of your relationship? The ease, the effortlessness with which you conversed, laughed, the way he looked into your eyes, and held your hand are among the many memories most women cherish when their relationship is just starting off. Now, six months into your relationship, things are still special, sure, but the intensity of your boyfriend’s affections are a little less intense and you’re worried he’s developing cold feet. Try out these five tips to show him that this is more than just a relationship, but, instead, this is one of those once in a lifetime soul mate scenarios.
1). Tell him about your dreams, desires, and hopes . . . slowly.
One of the complaints I hear from unhappy men all the time is that their wife or girlfriend is “forcing” or “pushing them” to radically alter their lives, plans, and goals. Naturally, both men and women have goals and dreams. But, telling your beau how many kids you want, where you want to live, how many garages you want the house to have, how you want a garden and a membership to the country club all within the first few months of a relationship can negatively affect him in two ways. For one, he might be overwhelmed by the quantity and specificity of these dreams and plans. Secondly, he might feel as if he needs to radically change his personality or plans to fit more perfectly with yours. Instead of telling him everything at once, let him know gradually, and maybe even subtly, what you want out of life. One month, mention the house and location, the next month, drop, “I want three kids,” casually in a conversation. Your dreams, after all, will still be there tomorrow.
2). Let him leave the wallet at home.
Most men feel intense pressure to spend, spend, spend on their ladies. Yes, true, you are worth it. But your relationship is in a later stage now, the bond of love and affection you two share should be firmly established. Plan fun activities — a day at the beach, a picnic, a walk around the neighborhood with the dog (Leave the cell phones at home!), that allows you two to reconnect without money acting as the intermediary.
3). Be Easygoing
Are you a control freak by nature? Are you always stressed out about what your boyfriend is doing with his friends, or what he’s up to when he’s not with you? Stop. You’re only showing your insecurities. Instead, trust what he says. Remember, he loves you. Men need time away from you to recharge their romantic juices, and not bugging him about what he’s doing when he can’t be (or isn’t) with you displays a degree of confidence in the bond that you two share. Men, especially as a relationship ages, want a woman who is no-frills and easy to get along with. You, too, might appreciate being a more laid back person in your relationship.
4. Respect and Admire Him
Relationship experts have long told us about the differences between how men and women communicate, and how those differences can end any relationship, no matter how strong. Men need to feel as if they are respected and admired. Compliment him honestly, and do it often. Has be been working out the gym lately? Tell him how muscular he feels when you’re cuddling. Compliment him on his keen decision-making abilities. Make something up — just make sure your praise is direct and that he understands how much you care for him. Don’t assume that he knows you are attracted to him, tell him so.
These four simple tips will no doubt resurrect your relationship from those post-honeymoon doldrums.