COMMENTARY | First of all, let me introduce myself. I am Char Milbrett. I have lived my entire life in Minnesota, currently residing in Waseca. I have been married for over 28 years and have two children. My children have both married and one has children.
In less than 24 hours from the writing of this article, the law will change allowing women to marry women and men to marry men in addition to continuing to allow 00men to marry women and women to marry men.
How do I feel about this?
Well. I voted yes to change the law. I voted yes because I do not believe that anyone should be forced to marry someone they do not want to marry. The choice, before Yes, was endure years of older people badgering and prodding and pressuring younger people to get married. The purpose? The whole purpose was to produce children.
Okay. I can see a man and a women getting married and having children. I believe that when a man and a woman get married, they enter into a marital contract and since they intend to have children that they should enter the relationship with the intent of fulfilling the ’til death we part’ contract. You would automatically assume that having two people of opposite gender would kindle the proper blend of characteristics for the child to imitate and become that esteemed citizen.
I can see two men or women getting married if they wish to live together, to share expenses and to generally live as a couple. As a married couple, they can share the burden of buying things, having a business, getting insurance for each other. They can also adopt some children if they so choose.
I have lived for 51 years and have watched people get married. I have seen some very friendly couples and I have seen some couples that were quite unkind. I have seen people who hear the love, honor and cherish rule of marriage, and agree to it in front of their family and peers. I have seen people who agreed to be wonderful to each other and upon visiting them later find that the man has decided that he is the boss and his wife is his slave and that the love, honor and cherish clause has ‘gone out the window’ and that the ‘obey’ rule has taken over.
Another subject that the subject of marriage between one man and one women brings up in my mind is the fact that some women stay married to horribly abusive men and endure being harassed on a daily basis because their self esteem has been so discouraged that they actually believe the rants and bullying of their spouse and truly feel too damaged to move on. I feel that this bullying represents a breach of contract. That when a man starts to bully his wife that he is breaking the promise of love, honor and cherish and something should be done. The people who encouraged the union in the first place should be held accountable, especially if they knew beforehand that this would certainly happen.
Well. Sometimes, these men cause women to reject men. Likewise, there are some circumstances that cause men to reject women.
I personally am thankful that if something ever happened to my husband and he was to die that I am not limited in my choice of spouse. If I choose to fall in love with another man or if I decide to follow my heart and marry another woman, I can, if I choose to.