What is believed to be beautiful? I think most of us may agree on the fact that a rainbow is beautiful, although, if it comes after a storm, the resentment caused by its destruction may not give us a very pleasant feeling at its sight.
Is beauty perfection? I think not. An autumn landscape may be considered by most beautiful. When you think about the amazing colours, the textures….but if you disassemble it all into pieces what do you get? Can broken leafs that have been steeped on be perfect?
Is beauty sticking to a pattern? Let’s talk about sunsets than come in all shapes and sizes. Does that make them any less beautiful?
Then, is beauty something out of the regular? Well, I don’t know the answer to this one. Maybe, depends on your perspective on things.
But if most of us can agree with beauty regarding nature, or any other thing uncontrollable by human nature, when it comes to us, especially our appearance things change dramatically.
If you show a picture of a model to a group of men, most of them will say she is beautiful, not only because her perfect figure, sculpted body and out from a fairytale hair, but because deep down they think if they say otherwise they will be regarded as freaks or worst people of poor taste, especially by their friends here present. Maybe they don’t usually like red hair or small breasts and if they saw that exact girl in a bar standing next to a brunette with d-cups they would go for choice number two. So is it about beauty or attraction?
Let’s show the same picture to a group of girls. Some will say she is beautiful, some will not. Why? Because they are comparing the picture to themselves. Is she prettier than I am? Do I feel pretty today, pretty enough to accept that someone else it pretty besides me? As far as I can see it, there are three types of girls. The type that feels comfortable with the way they look and use other well looking people for inspiration or as role models, not having a problem with competitivity. Let’s be honest, most of us don’t fit here although we wish we did. Type number two, constantly unhappy about their look, blaming it on lack of money, lack of good genes, being born in the wrong family, or, my personal favorite, not paying attention to these shallow aspects of life. This category will go either way: they might say, ‘Yes, she is beautiful’, and then turn their backs and walk away feeling bitter and unhappy, or ‘no, she is not’, without offering an argument, because they hate anything that they might be compared to, knowing they don’t stand a chance. And finally, type number three, girls that don’t look bad, work to improve their looks but still feel ugly, despite everyone telling them they look more than fine. These girls are perfectionists, no matter what they do, they must have done more, no matter what you say, you are wrong, you are lying or trying to make her feel better, not being objective, you have an alternative motive or, worst case scenario, you are feeling sorry for her. They know and appreciate good looks…in others, never themselves. They will say: ‘She is beautiful….’ and the phrase continues in her head, ‘…unlike me’, even though that might be wrong.
People rarely fit into a single category and maybe I left something out or I misjudged.
One thing is for sure, beauty is so much more than the way something or someone looks. It starts in our brain, and it’s a combination of what makes your heart beat faster, what puts a smile on your face for no particular reason, what society and modern life taught us is beautiful and what ideas we have developed ourselves of beauty based on books, movies, friends, family, school, magazines, commercials and so on. But beauty is also a lack of ugliness, something you can easily look at without feeling the need to look elsewhere. On the other hand, beauty is attraction. Beauty is what we make it, as life is what we make it.
If you ask me, the important thing is to look at a picture of yourself and a group people and either consider yourself the most beautiful one there and mean it, believe it, while being objective or, if not, see what’s wrong and improve it and while doing that give yourself credit for every success, no matter how small. That will be the fuel for your future motivation. And don’t stop until achieving what you want, don’t stop halfway because not only are you not going to forgive yourself, but you’re going lower than you started.
I’m sure if you’re a woman you thought at least once in your life if I were prettier things would have gone differently. Or, if you’re a man, you might have thought things would be so simple if I looked like Brad Pitt. I tell you it is not about the look itself but about how it makes you feel.
Be beautiful and believe it because it gives you self-confidence like nothing else. And with enough self-confidence, nothing will stand in your way. Yes, intelligence, power, money also give you confidence but why not start from the beginning. Who you are, including looks, is the foundation of your pyramid of power. A powerful man that feels ugly becomes frustrated. Why not use anything, everything to succeed? Why not think that the more advantages the merrier. Beauty is not about perfection, pattern, esthetics, not even taste; it’s about showing yourself you can do it, no matter what ‘it’ stands for.