She has spent all these years (hopefully) catering to you, making you feel like a King on his throne, answering to your every beckon call , stroking your ego and fulfilling you in ways that no other woman ever has and now whether planned or unplanned a new life has been created from the union of your love. Overnight, she has become an emotional hormonal wreck and you are the same happy-go-lucky Joe that you’ve been all your life. She’s begun whining and complaining and she’s making you feel like you can’t quite do anything right, so you think to yourself that now is the time to give her space, right? Wrong!
No matter how many loving supportive family members or “best friends forever” she has they did not impregnate your woman. If she doesn’t have a group of people in her life that are supportive of her decision to have a baby then you are the only player on her team and you have your work cut out for you. Don’t be the one to make her secretly doubt or regret her decision to be a mother. This is one of those times in her life where she will need you and will be depending on your strength more than ever. Believe it or not, the way you handle and treat her during these next nine months will greatly influence the way she responds to you after the baby is born. Why would she want to prepare dinner for you after you refused to make a late night run to the store for pickles and beef jerky that your embryo was craving? Why should she feel excited about being intimate with you again and satisfying you in bed when you didn’t make her feel sexy and desired throughout her pregnancy? When a man states that his wife stopped having sex with him during pregnancy or after childbirth I automatically conclude that he is somewhat if not mainly responsible for that circumstance. Regardless of what the doctor says, the source of her postpartum depression may in fact be unresolved feelings of hurt, disappointment and resentment toward her treatment during a very delicate and serious time of her life.
These nine months are hers, not yours! Once the baby is born she will become a devoted self-sacrificing mother. Most of the love and attention that she gave to herself will now be divided between you and the baby. Her body and self-image are going to change drastically. She will lose some of her freedom and independence. You knew this when you knocked her up so why not do your part. Do you know your part? It’s to be her hero for the next nine months (and the baby’s hero thereafter). Did you make sure she ate something healthy for herself and the baby today? When was the last time you gave her a full body massage? Ran her bubble bath? Listened to her talk about her hopes, dreams, goals, and fears? Did you call and ask how her tummy was feeling today? Did you let a day go by without rubbing it for her? When was the last time you made her brunch in bed? Did you try to make her laugh when she had a bi-polar hormonal episode, or did you leave, storm out and convince yourself that all women are crazy? We may be crazy, crazy in love over you and now is the time to show her that your feelings are mutual.
It’s the little things that count and the keyword is Romance. Just because she is pregnant and can’t fit into her clothes anymore doesn’t mean that there is no room for romance. In fact this is the time that she needs it most. You can watch romantic movies to get ideas or even do a yahoo search on ‘pampering your pregnant wife’. When did your lady become someone not worth spoiling? Maybe you use to pamper her in the beginning and as time swept by you fell into a state of familiarity and comfort. Even so, there is not a more perfect time other than this one to woo and win the heart and affections of your sweetheart all over again.
Since pregnant women operate and view everything in extremes you have two options. You can either be the total jerk that she will never forgive or her “Big Daddy” that she can’t get enough of. Do it right and you may have more little bundles of joy on the way and sooner than you think. When I see a woman with four, five or more children from her husband I can’t help but to think to myself that he must be very good to her and she can’t get enough of him. You should want to be that man. Good luck and congratulations on your new miracle!